The Writer just got back from visiting Matoaca Elementary school. She did a slide show that had pictures of Yours Truly. The Writer told her husband all the kids asked questions about me. How old I am. How much did I weigh (I hope she fibbed about that). What did I like to do for fun. One kid asked if I did school visits! I think I should!
You hate to ride in the car, remember?
That's because we're always going to the vet. And the vet always uses that thermometer . . . But if we're going to talk to kids, that's different. Easy peasy.
You realize that The Writer got up at 5:30 in the morning and drove two hours through snow and rain to get to that school. You can't sleep in your cushy dog bed if you do school visits.
Shhh. Don't tell anybody this is a dog bed.
You can't take a nap when you do school visits. The Writer talks to all the kids in the whole school, in groups. And then she autographs books--
--and then she had lunch. A nice big turkey sandwich with lots of meat! I don't care what you say. I'm going to start doing school visits. I'll fly in a private jet or ride in a limo. And I'll get one of those automatic pawprint machines for my autograph. And I'll ask for two turkey sandwiches. Maybe roast beef.